幽默笑話/英文笑話/I`m Glad I`m A Woman
【標題】：I`m Glad I`m A Woman
【簡介】：I`m glad I`m a woman, yes I...
【正文】：I`m glad I`m a woman, yes I am, yes I am.I don`t live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.I don`t brag to my buddies about my erections.I won`t drive to Hell before I ask for directions.I don`t get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down!I won`t grab your hooters, I won`t pinch your butt.My belt buckle`s not hidden beneath my beer gut.And I don`t go around "readjusting" my crotch,or yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch.I don`t belch in public, I don`t scratch my behind.I`m a woman you seeI`m just not that kind!I`m glad I`m a woman, I`m so glad I could sing.I don`t have body hair like shag carpeting.It doesn`t grow from my ears or cover my back.When I lean over you can`t see 3 inches of crack.And what`s on my head doesn`t leave with my comb.I`ll never buy a toupee to cover my dome.Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side.I`m a woman, you knowI`ve got far too much pride!And I honestly think its a privilege for me,to have these two boobs and squat when I pee.I don`t live to play golf and shoot basketball.I don`t swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.I won`t tell you my wife just does not understand,or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band.Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!Yes, I`m so very glad I`m a woman, you see.Forget all about that old penis envy.I don`t long for male bonding, I don`t cruise for chicks.Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick.I`m a woman by chance and I`m thankful, it`s true.I`m so glad I`m a woman and not a man like you!
【序號】：330